MisVish

So sometimes late at night, I go outside to sit and enjoy the peace and quiet.  In the distance I can hear the ocean.  Sometimes I smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life, times in my life that were both good and bad.  It’s the only time I’m completely alone.  Last night I dreamt that I was outside, but in a different place in my yard, I was on the other side of my house.  And then a man’s face appeared over the fence.  I was so terrified in my dream, I was so afraid of him. And in the dream, I knew that his appearance was inevitable, like I was expecting him to be there, and anticipating the outcome, which was not good. 

In reality, a few nights ago as I sat outside, it was so quiet, and so eerie, I heard things beyond the fence and I thought to myself, it’s a raccoon or an opossum, but even then, completely awake, I felt uneasy, and I actually moved from my normal, comfortable spot closer to the back door.  So is this just fear of the quiet? Or is someone out there in the dark watching? 

Always the same house, always my sister Kay is there.  Sometimes there’s a barn, sometimes not.  It’s always scary for some reason.  There’s a room in the house that is circular, I can reach this room from anywhere in the house.  And there’s a long, narrow hallway, with a rickity wood railing, that leads outside to a cliff.  This house has been in many, many dreams.

This is where I want to keep a journal of my dreams.  I don’t want it to go to my Facebook or Twitter, I want this to be my place for ME, my whole life is published on the internet I just want a place that’s maybe a little dark, where I don’t have to worry so much about what’s correct, or be judged.  There’s a place I’m in that many people don’t understand, so maybe if they come across this by accident they might understand me just a little bit.